I hate the Internet

LOL, that whacky Band-Uh!

2008-10-08T16:09:26Z

So, all of us who attended UC Davis are at least somewhat familiar with the Cal Aggie Marching Band, otherwise known as the "Band-Uh!". I don't know about you, but I remember during orientation basically being told that they were loud, geeky, nuts, and that whacky antics were the norm for them.

Well apparently, nobody told the new faculty band director about this.

I'm seriously considering calling up UC Davis to see if I can get in touch with these guys and adapt a "whacky college antics" movie out of this...the whole scenario sounds like something out of Revenge of the Nerds.

Aravis: The Market Age

2008-10-07T17:25:21Z

As some of you know, I have been working on a campaign setting for some time now, and recently began running a playtest of it. I thought it might be nice to offer a brief recap of what the players have been doing lately.

As the game began, a group of friends who had recently returned from some rather pedestrian mercenary work found themselves again contemplating guild membership. They knew it would be tough, dealing with the politics of rising in rank, but that's where the best work was. A chance meeting with a friendly Solicitor in a bar got them thinking about a third option: founding their own guild. A few hours later, they had a provisional guild license, two more guild members, and a contract to guard a caravan across the desert wastes of Hassar.

The Caravan Master was an experienced man, and travelled at night to avoid the desert heat. Unfortunately, many desert predators also come out at night, and the group was besieged by giant beetles, and later a horde of fairly large (about 3 feet long) scorpions. When they were but a few days away from the next large town (indeed, the largest city in Hassar) they encountered a grievously injured man. He had a large, seeping wound in his side, and could barely speak. He had stowed away on an airship headed to the city, and was discovered. While laws prevent throwing stowaways overboard (the fall, obviously, would kill them), there is no law against lowering them safely to the ground and leaving them there, regardless of how far they are from civilization.

They discovered that the man had been attacked by a large wasp, and that beyond the terrible wound (which they could heal easily enough with magic), the man had been implanted with wasp eggs, which would soon hatch and devour him alive. The Caravan Master, however, saw an opportunity: wasp eggs are a delicacy in Hassar. If they killed the man and cut him open before the eggs hatched, they could sell them at a profit. A member of their guild objected, claiming that she could cure the man medically, though there was a possibility that the cure could kill the man as well, and it could be painful. The group insisted that the man be consulted first, explaining his options.

The man explained that he was heading to the city to help his sister, who had fallen on hard times and was in danger of losing her house. Reasoning that his survival was uncertain, he agreed to let the group kill him (painlessly) and harvest the eggs, in exchange for them using the money to save his sister's home. Unfortunately, the only people with the medical knowledge to remove the eggs were the Solicitor (who refused, considering the outcome to be barbaric) and the Caravan Master, who insisted on a cut of the profits. The group put the man out of his misery, removed the eggs, and wrapped his body for transport to his family.

When they arrived in town, the Caravan Master sold the eggs for a tidy sum and took his share. The group found, to their chagrin, that the remaining shares were not sufficient to pay off the debts of the dead man's sister, and that she and her children were in danger of being forced into indenture. The group discovered a rather predatory system of financing at work in Hassar, and were at somewhat of a loss as to what to do. The money lender was not inclined to make arrangements for the sister because the land was worth more money than she paid for it, as a high-traffic commerce district (of the red-light variety) had sprung up around her; she was living on prime real estate. Still, the group was able to negotiate an extra day for the remaining money, and set about finding a quick job.

The quickest job they could find was actually collecting on another debtor; a man who lived about an hour's walk away from the city, in the desert wastes. They found a small compound there with walls 15 feet high and a pair of archers guarding the place. Negotiations for the peaceful surrender of the cash or the debtor failed, as the guild's Solicitor was negotiating better terms for the dead man's sister. The man reasoned that it was justifiable to remain delinquent on his payments, as the financiers were far greater thieves than he ever could be.

The group launched an attack, scaling the walls with ease and slaying the archers. It was when the group entered the debtor's home that they discovered the nature of his business; dead bodies littered the place, many of them animated and acting as a last-line security system. Through superior tactics, the group severely injured the man and dispatched his undead minions, and returned him to the collection agency. They were paid, and with the entirety of their reward they were able to pay off the last of the mortgage for the dead man's sister. In gratitude, she offered to let them use part of her land for the construction of a guild hall in the future. And so we have the entirety of their adventures so far.

Good news?

2008-10-02T21:57:11Z

I just heard back from Mary-Kay Gamel, the woman who was first listed as the author of that rather inflammatory Turtle Island story, then updated as merely the "forwarder". Here's what she said:

I have received thousands of emails and phone calls about the Turtle Island account.

I did NOT write that account, forward it under my name, or ask for it to be widely distributed.

I have never been to Turtle Island (which costs $2000/day), have never met Senator McCain, was a classics major, not an English Literature major, and never eat pancakes.

I regret the misinformation which is circulating, but it is not my doing, and I protest the misuse of my name.

How I think this happened: on 16 September I received this account 3rd-hand and forwarded it, with full email trail information and the name of the purported author (whom I don't know), to several friends with whom I discuss politics. It was further forwarded, and at some point the trail was deleted and I was misidentified as the author. I suspect whoever did this thought that my name and contact information would make the story more credible.

Snopes.com is investigating the account; current status "undetermined."

This is NOT an organized effort on the part of any political candidate.

I hope you will pass this information on to anyone interested in this story.

And finally, the story itself isn't necessarily false. But we'll never know unless the author herself comes forward.

MKG

I'm speechless...

2008-10-01T18:51:38Z

I didn't think that anything I heard about either candidate could really shock me at this point, but I was wrong. Obviously this is just a blog, so who knows if it can be completely verified, but it wouldn't be that hard to check and see if McCain went on vacation to the Fiji islands during the time mentioned in this article.

If you're wondering what shocked me, well...

McCain's appreciation of the beauty of Asian women was so great that David the American economist had to move his Thai wife to the other side of the table from McCain as McCain kept aggressively flirting with and touching her. Needless to say I was irritated at his large ego and his rude behavior towards his wife and other women, but decided he must have some redeeming qualities as he had adopted a handicapped child from Bangladesh. I asked him about this one day, and his response was shocking: "Oh, that was Cindy's idea - I didn't have anything to do with it. She just went and adopted this thing without even asking me. You can't imagine how people stare when I wheel this ugly, black thing around in a shopping cart in Arizona .

No, it wasn't my idea at all."

(The emphasis is mine)

I eagerly await Snopes getting a hold of this and confirming/denying it.

jonathancadle @ 2008-09-24T17:37:00

2008-09-25T00:37:37Z

My Liberal Identity:

You are a Social Justice Crusader, also known as a rights activist. You believe in equality, fairness, and preventing neo-Confederate conservative troglodytes from rolling back fifty years of civil rights gains.

Take the quiz at www.FightConservatives.com

You stay classy, Republican party!

2008-09-23T19:40:24Z

Disenfranchisement of African Americans in my country? It's more likely than you think.

Dreamcast Memorial Weekend

2008-09-22T18:36:50Z

A random forum discussion about Giant Gram 2000 has gotten me all misty-eyed and nostalgic. I've been wanting to do this for a while, and I think this is the right time. It's been eight years since the dorm room in Tercero at UC Davis. I have a TV, I still have my Dreamcast, and I've got plenty of games. I think you all know what I'm talking about.

Giant Gram 2000
Street Fighter III: Third Strike
Guilty Gear X (the original, dammit)
Jet Grind Radio
Crazy Taxi
Marvel vs Capcom 2

We're taking it back to 2001. Oh yes. If you are down with this, reply here and we'll make the plans. If you are not, then I just feel sad for you.

John McCain: Staggering Hypocrisy

2008-09-16T18:13:05Z

Remember when you couldn't mention John McCain without talking about what an honorable guy he was? Well, those days appear to be over. Remember when McCain was the victim of push-polling that spread ridiculous, insulting rumors about his family? Well, those days are here again, but now he's on the other side of the equation.

And it's not just a push poll: it's an ethnically-targeted push poll designed to feed Jewish voters vile lies about Barack Obama (you know, the secret Muslim). I'm not sure who should be more insulted though; Barack Obama, or the Jewish voters who are apparently assumed to be complete morons by Republican leadership.

My favorite one is "Barack Obama called for holding a summit of Muslim nations exlcuding Israel if elected president". Because, you know, Israel is totally a Muslim nation, right?

Republican pollsters, being the lying cowards that they are, are of course denying everything.

The next person that calls John McCain honorable to my face is getting slapped.

Sunday's game

2008-09-15T17:36:03Z

So, we took the plunge and started out this sunday. As expected, we were all running a bit late, and character generation took a bit longer than anticipated, but we got started, so it was all good. I am still looking for more players though. It's an easy system, similar in mechanics to regular D&D.

The campaign setting is still unnamed, but it takes place in a fantasy world with some familiar tropes (magic exists, as do adventurers...there are airships), and a few differences:

1. There are no dwarves, elves, goblins, etc. I wanted something a bit different. I replaced them with...something else, it's a bit of work to describe in full. There are still non-human races though.

2. Capitalism has arrived early in the world, and has gone wild. Abusive business practices abound, and legal concepts such as considering a Corporation to be an individual with the legal rights thereof, are in full effect.

3. Adventurers are considered a cost-effective supplement to military/diplomatic forces, in addition to the usual "fetch me the chalice of awesome" quests.

4. There is a fair bit of humor and fun with anachronism thrown in for good measure.

Starting a new campaign

2008-09-11T19:30:38Z

I've been working on a campaign setting recently. It needs testing, and I've been putting it off for too long. So starting this sunday afternoon, I'm going to be doing a playtest. Anyone who is interested is free to show up, give me a call in advance though. But one way or the other, I'm starting my playtest this sunday. If you can't make it this week, you're welcome to join in later. It's a D20 type game (actually using Green Ronin's True 20 system), but I will be happy to help out with the rules (they're simple) for new players.

The genre is fantasy, though there's a fair amount of steampunk/anachronism and humor involved. I think it'll be fun. My living room is also much roomier now, so we can actually play there.

Some interesting facts about Sarah Palin

2008-09-05T03:37:44Z

For reasons I don't understand, the media and bloggers have been obsessed with her 17 year old being pregnant and a bunch of other random bullshit about her family. What seems to have escaped their notice? Well...

Prior to saying "thanks, but no thanks" to the Bridge to Nowhere, she supported the damn thing, and said that Alaska should take advantage of earmarks while the getting was good.

She's virulently anti-abortion, even in cases of rape or incest (or, presumably, both). I've never really understood this position. Why would we want to empower rapists to essentially violate a woman continuously for 9 months, with the assistance of the government? By holding a woman accountable for the actions of her rapist, aren't we essentially advocating for the rapist?

For someone who claims to have put big oil in its place, she's awfully cozy with big oil...they even sponsored her inauguration.

She supported Alaskan secession. This does not sound like an activity undertaken by an American patriot. In fact, I'm pretty sure that's getting awfully close to sedition.

She's a super-fundie. She wanted to ban books, threatened to fire a librarian who said no to the idea, doesn't believe in evolution, wants to teach creationism in schools, and thinks that humans have nothing to do with global warming. The last point is particularly ironic, given how they've been selling her as being "green".

Oh, and lest we forget, she thinks that the war in Iraq is God's Holy Quest for America.

Look, I'm as disgusted as anyone by the underlying sexism in how women have been portrayed during this electoral season, and as someone from the West coast, it's good to see our guys getting some play, but this woman is nuts. She's crazier than Ron Paul, though probably not quite as racist. She thinks that community organizers have no responsibilities (have you ever met one?), and was mayor of what Alaska state troopers considered to be the meth capitol of Alaska. She was in the middle of an abuse of power investigation when she was nominated. Let's forget about qualifications here for a moment, just for the sake of argument. Even *if* being the mayor of a town with less people than my college dorm and a year's worth of governing Alaska was a reasonable preparation for Vice President to a man who would be our oldest sitting President ever, this is just a BAD IDEA. One of the nice things about not living in the Middle East is that we don't have to live under a fascist theocratic regime.

And yes, you can read that sentence again. I mean it. We've got some pretty intense fundies, but they only run as much of the country as we are willing to cede to them; they held the Presidency for the past 8 years because of the apathy of Americans, not because they seized it by force. The national guard isn't kicking down the doors of gay people and dragging them away for re-education. Abortion doctors are getting harder to find, but they're available; a woman who has been victimized is not forced to suffer for 9 months and give birth to the legacy of her attacker.

But these things are not permanent. If we want them, we have to defend them. FOREVER. There is no sleeping on this watch. If you want to live in the free world, you have to fight for it every day, because there is always going to be someone who wants to destroy it. And it won't be foreigners that are the worst threat; it comes from within. It comes wrapped in a smile and it is pleasantly dressed. It speaks softly and amiably, even as it begins to eat away at your life, destroying your rights and dragging you down into the pit of tyranny. It doesn't matter what they will do for your taxes; first of all, Obama's tax plan benefits more Americans than McCain's does, because Obama's plan affects the lower and middle class. Secondly, money will be a poor salve for what these people will do to our country. One must have priorities, and in America, freedom comes first. Not arguments about when life begins, or what the definition of marriage should be, or even the best way to fix our societal ills. Before any of those things are brought into consideration, we have a duty to defend freedom. John McCain and Sarah Palin are a threat to our freedom, and they cannot be allowed to succeed.

This is what Sarah Palin actually believes

2008-09-03T17:53:17Z

I hate youtube embedding, so I'm just going to give you the link

I eagerly await her defenders. Please explain to me why I shouldn't be worried about this person being a heartbeat away from the Presidency.

My Condolences

2008-08-30T22:38:19Z

Steve, I am very sorry to hear about your recent loss.

Tyrian

2008-08-22T06:06:02Z

I'm not sure how many of you have played Tyrian in the past. I remember when the shareware of it came out, I was hooked. It was absolutely beautiful for the time in which it came out, and the presentation was backed up with some awesome gameplay. At the time, the idea of a 2D shooter that let you buy upgrades to your ship was rather novel. Unfortunately, I was a broke kid when it came out, and the game became both obscure and outdated when I was older, plus it was a DOS game.

Happily, while browsing around a repository of open-source programs (I was there looking for an Ubuntu Linux build of Songbird, which is sort of an Open-Source iTunes, but that's a whole 'nother story. If you happen to be running Ubuntu (unlikely, I know) or another Debian-based distribution, you can find the .deb install files for the game here. Otherwise, you can head over to the OpenTyrian page at Google Code, where they have source code to compile, as well as Mac and Windows installs.

If however, as I suspect, this just seems like maddened ramblings to you because you have no idea what Tyrian is, well...try it out anyway. Apparently it's been freeware since 2004, but I think prior to this I either had a hard time finding the freeware version (I kept getting the shareware), or I was having trouble getting it to run within a modern OS. OpenTyrian solves both of these problems.

So I went to a lucha show last weekend...

2008-08-22T05:50:10Z

Very interesting deal...they drew more than twice as much as the Oaktown show I saw, most likely because of people who came for the metal, and the lucha fans. The doors opened a little late (about 15 minutes), and it turns out that I was slightly mistaken about the current location of the Oakland Metro...they moved about 4 blocks away from the old location, to a somewhat more industrial area. We were warned not to park on a particular street by a security guy who said "they" (he never said who) would bust our windows. Mind you, the place he suggested parking was across the street, so I doubt he knew what he was talking about, but whatever. Better merch tables than the Oaktown show, but still not that great. There was one table for the band, Savage Machine, one table with some lucha t-shirts and some dolls (mostly in kids sizes, to my chagrin), and a table with lucha masks (too small for me). They also had a lot of WWE stuff...a bunch of signed photos of random WWE guys, a pile of Rey Misterio masks, and some Rey Misterio t-shirts. The only guy at the show who had his own merch available was Chupacabra, who had some photos. Food-wise, the show was pretty awesome, as one of the sponsors was a Mexican restaurant, so they had freshly made tacos for $1.50.

I'm not a great match recapper, and my memory for the names of wrestlers I've seen for the first time is shitty, so bear with me here. The show was put on by Califa Promotions, whose website describes them as a group dedicated to bringing a mix of lucha and American style wrestling to Northern California. I also heard rumblings of them doing this again every two months or so, but take that with a grain of salt. The ring (and some of the staff) were on loan from Big Time wrestling, who apparently brought one of their cheaper, duct-tape ridden rings with them. The Ballard Brothers were there as well, as the Ring Announcer and the Referee (not sure which was which). I ran into the promoter (I think) for Big Time Wrestling, as well as some guys (one of whom is apparently half of the ICW tag team champions) from Insane Championship Wrestling. There were three of them, two guys and a girl, all in ICW t-shirts, handing out photocopied flyers for a show in San Bruno titled "Hardcore August Nights". They seemed like nice enough kids, but San Bruno is kind of a hike for me. Funnily enough the girl won a guitar from Savage Machine because she bought an assload of raffle tickets. Go figure.

So anyway...the wrestling. I didn't think much of the opening match, but it wasn't bad. I enjoyed seeing Vinny Massaro wrestle again. I didn't enjoy him walking out wearing Santino Marella's jacket quite so much, but what can you do? He hit some sweet lariats, but this wasn't really his show, so he didn't really get all of his big spots in...he did carry most of the work for the heels though. His partner was a thin guy in a vaguely Great Sasuke-esque outfit in blue and black. Also on the card was that local Sheik guy, who was working as a face tonight. The undercard had a fair amount of comedy, much of it involving manly beyond my wildest expectations jokes (the heels falling on top of each other suggestively, clutching one another in a cowardly fashion, etc.) and the crowd chanting vaguely homophobic stuff in Spanish. This is normally the kind of shit I ignore, but I was with a friend of mine who isn't much of a wrestling fan, and pointed it out. Not much to say about it other than it was lazy heeling all around, with the exception of Ryan Styles (who tagged with Michael Modest) and another white guy whose name escapes me. They had a good rhythm of spacing the wrestling with musical intermissions. The Main event was alright, but the finish was off...one of the faces hit this...shit, I forget the name, but it's a flipping thing sorta like a Canadian Destroyer, but it's from a 'rana position...it's in Fire Pro, but I forget the name. Anyway, he hits that, and the motherfucker kicks out of it?! And then they finish it with a shitty looking chair spot a minute later. The crowd was totally ready to buy the finish with the flipping thing, it was the most finisher-like thing they'd seen all night outside of Modest's Air Raid Crash, which was broken up too quickly to be taken seriously as a finish.

There were a couple of miscues throughout the night, with some guys being sloppier than others. At some point the crowd started chanting "You Fucked Up", which is how I knew there were some smarks in attendance...I couldn't see it the first time, but during the main even they moved, and I could see that it was the ICW guys chanting. Oddly enough, the ICW guys apparently don't hang out or promote themselves on Internet forums, which surprised me. Apparently they just use Myspace. I mean really...what the hell, dude? How do any of these promotions expect to draw wrestling fans using only MySpace and their own word of mouth? How hard is it to put a link to your website or whatever in a forum sig, and troll about some forums? Or at least post someplace like NorCal Uncensored? Ah well.

So anyway, good show, lots of fun, the metal was great, the wrestling was alright, and it was worth the $12 I spent. They drew pretty good for a sunday night in Oakland, filling all of the seats they put down on the floor plus a decent number (20+) people standing. I'd check it out again if they ran in that venue. I think they should set down more chairs next time though, and put the merch tables in a more visible place. As it was, when I first got in there, I could barely see any of the t-shirts because the lights were low. It was pretty clear that the venue staff weren't familiar with setting up for a wrestling show, but they can learn.

Not Cool.

2008-07-09T22:25:23Z

He announced that he'd be doing this a while ago, much to the chagrin of his supporters, but Barack Obama has now officially flip-flopped on an issue that a good deal of his progressive base actually cares about. Let me re-iterate this: he just voted to the right of Hillary Clinton and John Kerry. Mind you, I have a sneaky suspicion that if she has gotten the nod their positions might have been reversed, but I still consider this to be a general failure of Democratic will (which is, of course, an oxymoron).

So glad I never registered with that party.

An update on my gaming backlog

2008-07-09T17:17:12Z

Removed from the queue:
Grand Theft Auto 4, which I finally beat last Saturday.
Izuna: Legend of the Unemployed Ninja, because my save got corrupted when I was on the last dungeon, and while I may go back to play it, I no longer feel any particular desire to re-do all of that work.

Added to the queue:
Disgaea: Afternoon of Darkness
Final Fantasy Tactics: War of the Lions

Which means that the queue is currently:

PC
Diablo II (w/Lord of Destruction)
Star Wars Jedi Knight: Jedi Academy (never going to finish this, but I won't uninstall until I do)
Dungeon Siege II (I think I'm close, I could probably kill this off over the weekend)
Restricted Area

PS2
Final Fantasy XII
Yakuza
Grandia III
La Pucelle Tactics

XBOX 360
Lost Odyssey
Mass Effect (I want to join the 1000 achievement club on this game; I've beaten it already though)
Overlord
Penny Arcade Adventures: On The Rain-Slick Precipice of Darkness

DS
Puzzle Quest
Luminous Arc
Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney
Final Fantasy III

PSP
Final Fantasy Tactics: War of the Lions
Disgaea: Afternoon of Darkness
Genesis Collection (there are 3 Phantasy Star games that I want to beat on that)

I've decided that I'm going to get serious about clearing out this backlog. Now that I've caught up with Season 3 of BSG, I've got a bit more time. Also, I'm trying to be a bit more efficient with my off-time, so I spend less time bored, or taking care of errands that take too long. I'm pretty sure I can kill of Phoenix Wright, Penny Arcade, FF XII, and Dungeon Siege 2 within the next month or so.

First thoughts on the PSP (and Final Fantasy Tactics: War of the Lions)

2008-07-01T22:38:50Z

I've had the damn thing for less than 20 hours, but lets get started. First, the PSP:

- One of the least comfortable handhelds I've experienced. The fingers on my right hand actually went numb at ont point. The reasons are multiple...unlike a DS, which has one screen flipped up, this one is totally flat, so the holding position is less than natural. But the same can be said for the GBA, and I don't remember it being this uncomfortable. Ergonomic FAIL.

- Beautiful screen. Seriously, I love the size, the brightness, the adjustable brightness (instead of having to reboot and go into settings, like I do with the DS). The screen WINS, big time.

- Networking capabilities are untested, currently. I just haven't had time. I like the feature set though, and while I already have an MP3/video player, I could see this rapidly supplanting my Creative Zen Vision:M for video purposes, based on screen size alone.

- UMDs are poorly designed, with nothing protecting the sensitive media when they're outside of the case. A simple sliding flap would have done wonders for the durability of the media. Oh well.

Onward to Final Fantasy Tactics: War of the Lions, a remake of a game that I already own, and am thus rather familiar with. To get the "bad stuff" out of the way first, the animation slowdown is ridiculous and inexcusable. We're talking about a PS1 game, for crying out loud. This is just shoddy coding. Everytime I cast a spell or use any sort of special ability, the game suddenly chugs for a few seconds.

Now for the awesome: the dated, even-ugly-back-in-the-late-90's 3D animation of the original has been replaced with beautifully cel-shaded cinematics, which appear more often, actually use camera angles for dramatic effect, and generally improve the presentation of the game by at least 50%. Granted, a good 30% of that improvement is negated by the animation slowdown, but whatever. The game itself is as I remember it. At first I thought they might have tweaked the AI, but I think that's just illusory; your "guests" fight just as badly as ever, and the opponents are generally clever enough to put up a good fight, or even serve you if you aren't conservative with your tactical deployment. Unlike that horrible piece of crap that they put out on the GBA, this isn't a game that hand-holds you and tosses softballs, relying on gimmicky "laws" to provide the challenge: this is a real strategy game.

I can't be sure about any sound downsampling until I try outputting from the PSP, since it's hardly a fair comparison between my PS2 hooked up to a Samsung HDTV, and a $160 piece of Sony consumer electronics that I picked up for a hundred bucks.

Disgaea: Afternoon of Darkness is next on my acquisition list. After that, it's a mixed bag of Alpha 3, the GTA games, and some other strategy RPGs. Ironically though, I think I enjoy the full console on my TV to the handheld experience, which isn't what I expected. If you haven't played the *real* Final Fantasy Tactics after more than 10 years, by all means get up and do so. You're cheating yourself with the kindergarten knock-offs that Square is releasing these days.

Immature? Yes. Funny? Yes.

2008-06-27T16:03:20Z

Brief Update

2008-06-26T20:19:13Z

I haven't updated in a while. Most of the people who read this already know, but here's what's going on:

1. I switched jobs, and I work in Berkeley now. No more video editing, I'm in more of a tech position now. I work with a lot of academic institutions.

2. GTA IV has claimed ownership of most of my evenings. Also, if you haven't played the Penny Arcade game, you might want to get on top of that. Also, next-gen consoles are considerably enhanced by HDTV.

3. Congratulations to AJ and Allegra, of course.

4. I have a new(er) car. Kind of procrastinating on getting rid of the old one.

5. Obama FTW, etc. I'm disappointed that he's favoring this "compromise" bill on immunity for the phone companies that participated in warrantless wiretapping, but he's the lesser evil by many orders of magnitude.

6. Last week, I swear I saw a guy who looked just like Richmond in Oakland. I know it wasn't him, but...damn, the guy looked a lot like Richmond.

I think that about covers it.

I suppose it was only a matter of time...

2008-02-14T20:25:56Z

The rampant xenophobia that has gripped airport security since 9/11 has finally killed someone. In this case, it was a 14-day old infant from American Samoa, travelling to Hawaii for heart surgery. Apparently it is not common knowledge that keeping a two-week old infant in a locked interrogation room is a bad idea, especially when the kid has a heart problem so serious that they would risk transporting him by airplane when he's only 14 days old. Apparently the family is filing a wrongful death suit, but this is really a case where criminal charges should apply. Some asshole bureaucrat at the airport just murdered a fucking infant. If that isn't deserving of lethal injection, nothing is.

I...don't know what to make of this

2007-10-05T23:47:28Z

Sometime around wednesday the "Crank Dat" meme hit my office. In case you've been spared the horror of this, I'll explain it briefly. It's a song by a guy named Soulja Boy. He's a 17 year old rapper who had the brilliant idea of promoting his album via Myspace and Youtube by making an instructional video explaining how to do the dance associated with the song "Crank Dat (Soulja Boy)". The Internet has responded with a billion kids all willing to make jackasses of themselves dancing on camera. It started with one guy photoshopping a co-worker's head onto Superman with the caption "SUPERMAN THAT GIRL!!!" on it and daring the guy to keep it on his desk. The following day, I saw a girl in my department watching the Lion King version of the video.

I wasn't quite sure what the hell it was, when another co-worker offered to show me the dance. I declined, but today she came by and linked me to the Barney version of the video, which led to other links to one of many "white girl" versions, a Japanese version, and perhaps most disquieting, a version involving what appear to be a bunch of 5 year olds.

And with that, I'm left wondering. On one hand, children dancing is always adorable, and their enthusiasm has a certain innocence to it that makes it hard to me to really get mad about it. On the other hand, on the list of "least appropriate pop songs for 5 year olds to be dancing to", I have to think that a song with the line "Superman that ho" has to make the top of the list. I mean really...what the hell, dude?

Well, it's now official.

2007-07-12T22:55:27Z

Catching up to the rest of us about a year late, President Bush announced today that he is formally admitting that someone in his administration leaked Valerie Plame's name. And don't let Republican apologists fool you. Valerie Plame was covert. And yes, that's four separate links to four different stories on the subject.

While some people may find it amazing that the President is cheerfully admitting that someone in his administration has committed treason or, at best, purposefully undermined our national security over a stupid grudge, what I find interesting his his assertion that we 'move on' from here. As if this was just something minor, something not worth making a big deal about. And what amazes me even more is that we are actually doing it. Go check the front page of any news site. Pick up a newspaper and look around. Where is this story? Buried in the politics section somewhere, just another random "inside the beltway" story of no interest to your average American. Because hey, what really matters is another Iraq deadline that doesn't really mean anything, and Miss New Jersey getting to keep her crown.

I'd register my disgust with the Democratic Congress by leaving the party, except that I never joined it in the first place. If they were really serious about holding the President's feet to the fire over what he's done to this country, we'd be waist-deep in impeachment hearings by now. Instead, they're playing footsie because a good chunk of the new congressional democrats are too conservative or too ball-less to take that kind of a stand against the Republicans. Small wonder they're the only people in politics with a lower approval rating than the President.

BET losing sponsors on "Hot Ghetto Mess"

2007-07-11T21:34:13Z

http://tv.msn.com/tv/article.aspx?news=268509

I don't know how long that link will remain kosher, but the gist of it is that BET recently began airing a show called "Hot Ghetto Mess", hosted by Charlie Murphy. The show is a spin-off of the website of the same name, which features photos of (mostly/entirely african-american) people with 'ghetto' hairstyles and clothing, or who are otherwise portrayed in an unflattering manner. The idea is that you look at them and laugh and how ghetto they are.

Surprise surprise, there are people who found the idea of bringing this concept to cable TV on the nation's preeminent black television network a little offensive. Browsing the comments on the story, I saw at least one person who was complaining of first-amendment right infringement...which is kind of a straw-man argument here. The government isn't asking BET to do anything about this. Some corporations decided that they didn't feel like paying for it. That's their prerogative. If I buy a taco from you for lunch, and the taco sucks, I'm not obligated to keep buying tacos from your ass because you have a right to make shitty tacos. You can still make them, you're just not going to sell them. Now, if I called the cops and said "arrest this man because his tacos suck", they'd laugh me out the door, and with good reason. You have a right to make crap that nobody wants to buy.

If you want to watch television free of influence from corporations, watch PBS. If you value the idea of television and radio programs that cannot be cancelled or interfered with to match a corporate agenda, then maybe you should start demanding more public funding for NPR and PBS, because they're hip-deep in corporate money too, because apparently we can spend a few billion dollars a year fighting someone else's civil war, but we can't spare a few tax dollars to ensure that a venue for truly fair, balanced, and corporate-free media continues to exist.

Back to Hot Ghetto Mess, I've talked to Ant about this before. You see, BET is run by a guy named Reginald Hudlin, who happens to write Black Panther for Marvel comics. A year ago, I used to post on his forums to talk comics and such, and someone linked to the HGM site. It straddles a line, in my opinion, between acceptable humor at the expense of ignorant people (see Borat) and racism. The site owner is an african-american lawyer, and I consider this whole mess (no pun intended) to be another chapter in the ongoing class warfare between wealthy, educated african-americans and the poor, poorly-educated african-americans who embarass them. Or rather, who make them feel embarassed. If your rich white friends can't tell the difference between you, the black guy who makes $90,000+ and has a tastefully-accessorized BMW, and the jackass on the east side of town "rolling on dubs" with spinners and a greasy jheri-curl, then that's the fault of your racist asshole friends, not your local crack dealer. I don't feel embarassed by the kids I see on the bus with gold fronts and Mac Dre t-shirts, because I don't feel associated with them. We're a generation apart, we listen to different music, and really all we have in common is that we're both on our way to Berkeley. Do you know any Chinese-Americans who feel embarassed because of the food safety problems that China is having right now? No? Any of your white friends hanging their heads low when Scooter Libby was sentenced? Yeah? What about non-Republicans? Yeah, that's what I thought.

People like the Hot Ghetto Mess guy and BET need to realize that there is no redeeming social value to pointing and laughing at unflattering pictures of black people. Likewise, for the people offended by it. Both points of view feed into the fallacy that all black people form a continuum in which everyone is responsible for the actions of someone else. The fact is, racism aside, if you're an African-American with an office career in downtown S.F., chances are you've got more in common with that Abercrombie & Fitch wearing Asian guy in the cubicle next to your's than you do with some random dude from West Oakland who happens to have the same skin tone as you. African diaspora solidarity is a great idea, but I don't see how this class-warfare/resentment thing between "black people and niggers", as Chris Rock once put it, helps anything. Release your desire to control the lives of people who happen to share a skin tone with you, and help them out because they NEED HELP, and because uplifting the living standards of the poor benefits everyone, not because of some outdated Victorian science that says people who look like you are more deserving of your compassion.

In case you missed it...

2007-07-02T22:50:41Z

"Would all you idiots who voted for this asshat TWICE please, now, kindly promise to never cast a ballot again?"

--Some guy on Fark.com

Harsh words, but I can't say that I disagree. I remember thinking a lot about the nature of suffrage while reading Starship Troopers. While I dislike Heinlein's idea of building a militant, eternally-at-war meritocracy as a solution to the problems posed by human nature, I'm starting to wonder if we shouldn't begin to rethink our requirements for voters.

But I digress.

The real news is that, to the surprise of basically NO ONE who has a working brain and thus understands what kind of slimebucket we've elected (twice in a row, mind you), Scooter Libby will never see a day in jail. While it is true that Richard Armitage is most likely the man who actually leaked Valerie Plame's name, that was never the issue with Libby. Fitzgerald charged him with lying under oath, which he did. That is a crime. Crime must be punished regularly, consistently, and without favor, or else the law has no merit. We live in a world where nobody respects the law or those who enforce it because said enforcement is so obviously biased. We just finished going through a month and a half of media bullshit to make sure Paris Hilton had to go to jail, not because we honestly give a shit that some twig with a silver spoon in her mouth drove with a suspended license, but because it was important to show that nobody is above the law.

And today, with one swift stroke, any moral ground we gained in doing that has been swept away by a man who, in all likelihood, has no concept of what he's actually done. Now, I'm not saying that Bush is an idiot. On the contrary, I'm of the mind that he's a very intelligent man, who cultivates an image as a moron to make his job easier. But I do think that he lacks the moral solidity to conceive of what justice really is, and how to go about creating and preserving it. There are concepts (Justice, God, True Love, True Hatred) that cannot be adequately quantified, understood, pondered, or executed by the intellectual mind. They are beyond intellect, because they have no firm basis in reality as our intellectual mind experiences it. Physics can exist within the intellectual mind, because we interact with physics on a daily basis. Race, while existing as a social construct and thus having no truly physical manifestation (if you don't believe me, talk to a Dominican about what constitutes being 'black', and compare it to the American version), is still reachable by the intellectual mind because it is ultimately based on a discernment of physical appearance, and the various (fallacious) extrapolations we make based on this.

To understand something like Justice, or God, one must at some level examine them internally. A new age person might say that you must understand them on a spiritual level, and for lack of a better term, that's what I'll call it. For this reason, it is impossible for a morally inferior individual to behave in a just manner. This is not the same as someone who commits a crime knowing that what they are doing is wrong; I'm not speaking of criminals. I'm speaking of decision makers, judges, and people who are called to make moral decisions. We do not test them for moral fortitude, which is a mistake. We allow them to convince us that they understand moralilty, which is ridiculous. Morality isn't something you understand; it's something that you have, or you don't have, like the ability to curl your tongue or wiggle your ears. Ethics can be taught. Behavior can be taught. Law can be taught. Morality is doing the right thing simply for the sake of doing the right thing, and is an internal process. A person without moral sense can still be a productive member of society if they are taught ethics and lawful behavior at the appropriate age, but there is a limit as to how "good" of a person they will be. An immoral person who has been properly trained will be as "good" as the law requires, no more, and no less. If the law can be subverted, they will do everything they can to subvert it in order to pursue their immorality, because that is their nature.

The Iraq war, the millions of Iraqis dead, the hundreds of thousands of Americans dead, the trillions of dollars wasted, the graft, Hurricane Katrina, the crony-ism, the stolen election(s)...none of these things are the fault of George W. Bush, any more than the stingray who killed Steve Irwin is guilty of murder. Who placed him in the position to cause so much damage to our Republic? America did. Who has permitted our legal system to decay so utterly that guilt and innocence are matters of argument and opinion rather than fact? Americans. We have accepted the leadership of the morally unfit, in government, in athletics, and in the realm of celebrity. We are living in garbage of our own creation.